All it Took!

Its been 2 years (almost) since i was in my last relationship with my ex Elijah. When i was in it, i thought it was the best thing ever. Like my "love life" couldn't get any better then what it was. That's until that one thing!

My friend Thadde Poo, was saying on his Facebook status; that females are basically bipolar with their feelings towards guys. I said that rejection hurts, men do the same thing. They loved you to death in the relationship, and then when its over; its like the love never existed! (FYI: When you really love someone, no matter, friend family, or partner; that shit just don't go away over night, or probably ever!)

Me and Elijah always had a funny relationship, very off and on all the time. It was a headache at times, there was good time too, but i loved him so much. Even when we weren't together, it was hard for me to move on. On the outside i was like fuck that nigga, but on the inside, i just wanted him back in my life. The last time we broke up, i thought that it would've been like any other time. Until i changed my number and i lost contact (for a lil ass min)! When we did end up speaking again, (we always did find our way back into each others life no matter what) it was like everything was all good, and we would just pick up from where we left off.....

Until he told me he was about to have a baby. A daughter. I was stuck on stupid when he told me that. It was only a year since we stopped fucking with each other. So i was like damn my nigga! So fast. We was together for 3 years and that was not a topic we agreed on too much, especially in a worst case scenario! That shit hit home. It was all over. All those feelings i had, that were so strong, went right out the window.

When you're in a relationship, their are things that make you be like wtf sometimes. Their are things that make you stick it out with someone. Their are things that happen, but you think really hard about decisions because of the way you feel. I never though i would ever get over this nigga, but all it took was him telling me that he had a baby! That shit blew mine.

When you really have strong feelings for someone, it just doesn't go away that easy (if you're trying to make it go away at all). So if ya significant other objects to these feelings the second day of a brake up they was fucking with you the whole time or maybe all it took was that one thing!

It Be Like That Sometimes!

Cuffing Season? WhereTheyDoThatAt?!?!

I'm not a fan of casual dating. I like to be settled with one person. Its a lot more fun and less fucking headaches! I haven't been in a relationship for forever now. Like two years! I just been chilling, talking to whoever i feel like, laying up with whoever i feel like laying up with; however I'm getting tiered of it (i been tiered)!

Anywho i been seeing this guy for a lil tiny minute, and we really click. i click with a lot of people, cause I'm just that bitch; but he completes my sentences, he says things I'm thinking, and he feels the same exact way i feel about relationships. No bullshit. Its crazy, that the idea of the whole "cuffing" bullshit never crossed my mind, cause i think I'm a little bit too old for games like that.

Cuffing or Cuffing Season i should say? What is that you might ask! For some that don't know "Cuffing Season" is when your usually just dating, nothing serious and the time of the year comes up when its bought to be cold. Fall/Winter per say! Example: Ive been seeing this guy from March until September but he never wanted anything serious..... until October! Now he wants me all to himself (supposedly!) So now were all boo'd up....until it gets hot again! Then he don't know how to act!

I got a lil happy of the idea of actually being in a relationship after such a long time. So, i put a lil indirect status on Facebook thinking nothing of it. I just had to put this thought i had somewhere. So my cousin comments on it. Were going back and forth on FB like two fools. Shes trying to tell me, that I'm trying to cuff him, and he trying to cuff me! I'm like duhhh...... permanently! (I'm in my head like wtf is she talking bout!) So then she going on and on and on. Of course i shut the whole convo down.

Like dead ass, who still does this cuffing season bull shit? At first I'm like she just mad, cause a nigga trying to cuff her ass for a fucking season. Don't be mad that the nigga tyring to wife me! Not cuff, wife! I guess immature minds don't understand that shit. It had me puzzled for a lil min, then i realized who i was talking to! I'm not a person that feeds into bullshit or comments from other people about my own situation...but lets be serious? WHERE THEY DO THAT AT?

Coke or Pepsi?

So this post has nothing to do with soda. lol But um yea, soooo, my whole reasoning behingd the title is how do you choose. Same beverage concept, but apparently some people prefer one over the other. That's why both companies still exist in and are in high competition.

When you're dating, you're not "tied down" to any one particular person. You can fuck and suck and fuck whoever you want, (per say)! Any who when it comes down to that point when its time to make a decision, or as i call it CRUNCH TIME; how hard does it become to choose between people. Clearly if you're dating this person, its for a reason. (Well then again, maybe its not!Maybe you just want some good head, or maybe that person has some fat pockets!!! All the wrong reasons, but to eachs' own!)

I'm in a situation where i (technically) been single for a hot ass minute, and i been SWIMMING in the waters! Like deep sea diving, and snorkeling, and all that other hot shit. You get the point I'm trying to make though! Now, I'm like ok i can settle again. Ive been seeing a few people, but there are two specific people i know i can be with on a serious level. The hard part for me is, how do i know that I'm making the right decision picking one over the other. Well then again i guess you don't really know do you? How would you make a decision like this?

Should the Past Effect the Future?

Meeting someone that you would like to get serious with is like a mission. There are just so much things you have to consider.

One thing i think about a lot is the PAST. Not how many people the person slept with, (cause its 2009 and everyone has a lil whore in them!) or how many kids the person had in previous relationships. Those are things that can be worked out or talked about to better the relationship; if it were to cause a problem. However, some things just cant be taken back!

STD's and INCARCERATION; what do you think about that? What if you met someone and they did 10 years in jail for a crime they are aware that they committed; such as dealing drugs or assaulting or killing someone? What if you met someone that had a STD before you met them? Would you feel safe and secure? Knowing that this person has a history of diseases that are sickly and deadly; or a past of violence!!

Me personally, i try really hard not to be judgemental. As far as STD's goes, i don't think that everyone is 100 with their partner. That's sad, but at the same time its true. That's why their is such a high rate of diseases among young adults. Also, if that was the case the shit wouldn't be spreading so rapidly! For the incarceration, it depends on the situation. You cant try to holla at me with domestic charges, cause how do i know you wont try to whoop my ass. Like i said earlier i take everything in to consideration.

I met a guy that's 24yrs old fresh outta jail for Manslaughter charges from a teenager. That's a severe situation. He explained the situation and we spoke for a while (still a lot more speaking to do!) and i really got to talk to him. His head was in a place so much more beyond his age its not even funny. Hours on end of conversation wit this guy and i feel like we on the same page to the T! When i speak he finishes my sentences! When i think something, he says it out loud. Its so ironic to meet someone like that that you click so well with. Our connection is something that i can see going far, BUT what about the past?

All i can do is see if HIS future is something that can be bright. I'm sure he would have a very hard time getting his feet wet because of his past situation. I'm not gonna give up on him though. If i see someone that is true to their word, and come back from certain circumstances, and handle his business; FUCK IT! Whats the difference from someone that doesn't have a past anyway. A man is a man!